PeachPie đMan who threw sandwich at federal agent in D.C. says it was a protest. Prosecutors say it's felony assault
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www.pbs.org/newshour/nation/man-who-threw-sandwâŚ
You give us Bivens federally, weâll stop throwing sandwiches.
Does that include tear gas canisters?
He said when youâre âmadâ. Itâs fine if itâs because of hate and assholery.
I assume every ICE agent is a Nazi piece of shit who gets off to videos of his buddies zip tying children. Am I justified in throwing a sandwich now?
No because throwing sandwiches at fascists doesnât count as âassholeryâ.
No, youâre hating the wrong people.
No, he meant Itâs only problem when we are mad.
They persist on insecure anger constantly. When they are mad it is automatically justified.
So I should say a joke before I hurl a sandwich, to show I am both 1) not mad and 2) itâs just a prank bro. Salami high fives for Mr Parron!
Makes you wonder how the pig feels about being the victim of a felony cold cutting.
I thought they had reduced it to misdemeanor because the Grand Jury would not indict on a felony charge because it was too ridiculous?
To quote another thread:
Assault with a deli weapon.
This isnât really a great time to be hamming it up.
Bologna assault at wurst.
Clearly the federal agent should have moved out the way. Onus is on them.
If itâs a legitimate assault, the federal agentâs body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down.
Pretty sure just standing there shuts down a thrown sandwich.
What a bunch of insecure children.
This can never be said enough, even (and especially) in seemingly unrelated ways. Keep doing the good work.
Your honor my client was mearly passing the sandwich to the pig with passion! They normally like being fed!
âFelony assaultâ? Is that a new addition to the subway menu?
No, been there at least since the Jared days. Though thereâs argument that the assault to your senses has always been there.
They called it the kidâs menu back then.
Maybe it only happened in the movies but I thought there was a time in this country when it was common to throw rotten tomatoes at politicians and Iâve long wished for it to return.
Thatâs the problem with these bastards. They can spend their whole life going places where no common person can say anything they might hear. But get smacked in the face with some rotten produce and you know what they think of you and your bullshit.
The ham on rye equals tear gas I suppose. MAGA today.
see, throwers on both sides!
As American as baseball.
First off, yes this was assault. Hilarious assault, but assault. But Iâd be too humiliated to testify as the âvictimâ is quoted. Of course he felt it. Heâs also feel it if I lightly pushed him with my pinky finger.
Technically assult would be very difficult to prove unless he threatened to throw it first, Iâm totally not trying to be an ass, but assault requires a moment where the victim can claim a fear or threat of it happening. I am 100% not saying battery wasnât commited (in the most hilarious way possible), but assault may be pushing it.
All this being said, Iâm not a lawyer and only know the difference because Iâve had to look it up a few times after discussions like this. Iâve also not seen any footage and would love more than anything for there to be a video of some standoff between them first, a dude with a gun/tazer/baton just trying to determine his odds against a bit with a sandwich. Lol
I think we had a similar thing where someone threw/slopped tomato soup on a well-hated TERF(?) Pose Parker here in NZ.
But weâve also got the delightful precedent of throwing Silicone dildos at our politicians, tooâŚ
If it was felony assault, one of the THREE grand juries would have voted to charge the felony
*Bologna!