Even their fish are fucked up

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Even their fish are fucked up
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In other words, mass spectrometry is still able to detect trace amounts of molecules.

Now do lead, cadmium, nuclear fallout, truck tire residue, nano plastic, etc.

I’d like to see US catch analysis.


You sounds smart, is this the same jazz they used in that ncis/mythbusters episode to figure out which wine bottle was from pre nuke testing and which was counterfeit?
Or do I need to be snorting my shrimp tails?

If you don’t snort them slide em this way.

Can I have some too? I do love seafood




Yeah, this sounds a lot like those radioactive shrimp (less than half as radioactive as bananas). Some tests are sensitive enough to be nearly useless.



Fuck all of you!

On the one hand it’s ‘Hurr durr, the English don’t use any spice’, and now it’s ‘hurr durr, the English over-spice their shrimp’.

It’s so cost effective too. You only need a few grains for it to make a difference


I have a friend who uses snuff tobacco, and occasionally she’ll add some cocaine to it — she calls it “spicy snuff”



The 2019 study tested a small number of sites in Suffolk, so not all of England.

Funny how something so seemingly direct can be a lie

In the shitpost’s defense, the shrimp is pictured doing lines of cocaine with a US banknote. So accuracy wasn’t the goal. Everyone knows that shrimp snort their lines with British currency.

Nah, the real reason is because British currency is too heavy for shrimp.



I mean it was ‘every shrimp that was tested’

Every one from the same plate that came from the same kitchen in the middle of skiing season.





I like cropping images like this to remove context

Brings me joy

Keep doing the Lord’s work


And your contributions bring us joy.


This offers a much more complete and believable story too.


For some reason missed the text above the pic box, and I was like shrimp possessing and doing blow brings you joy? The context of your context cropping helped me enjoy it more.



Isn’t just about every banknote contaminated with cocaine?

Trace amounts, yes. This is normal.



I’m vegan but next time in Britain I’ll order shrimp

Just go to a shrimp bar, if you explain to them that you are not about to eat them, they will allow you to party with them, share the drugs.



Shrimps are known for their cocaine abuse. Fuckers gotta be constantly stuffing their noses.

I’m not sure they even have noses

They’re tootin’ it up somehow. Every see one of those things swim? Fast. The ONLY explanation is cocaine.




Maybe the testers were just working overtime and needed a little help with that.


Oh, I’ve read this one before! The cocaine was so pervasive, they even found it in the blanks! Too bad publishing that makes the report kind of useless.

If you really want to see something, and you’re sloppy with your blanks, an LCMS can detect anything you want.


Those buggers must be filthy rich


50% cocaine, 50% raw sewage.

… that description covers like so many professions tho …



Either shrimp party much harder than previously thought or we need to take environmentally focused measures.

As a US legislator, I move to arrest or bomb all shrimp, or anyone suspected of being pro-shrimp.

You’re either with us, or you’re with the shrimp.


Yo crazy pic they got of my home boy Jameson right there, def not sloppy slop.


I love go fast shrimp crackie


craziest thing I’ve seen all day


(In unrelated news: all cocaine testers found to be really high on cocaine all the time, often sharing cocaine with party test subjects.)




Good thing they only eat prawns.


Hell yeah boys


Nothing to see here, folks! Fake news! Stop asking questions - no drugs here! Fuck it, I’m gonna go buy a yacht!


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